In a world that often values perfection and masks vulnerability, Jesus' post-resurrection encounter with his disciples serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of embracing our wounds and scars. According to John 20:20, Jesus showed his disciples his hands and side, bearing the marks from the crucifixion, without shame or hesitation. He didn't try to hide the wounds or wear gloves to conceal his injured hands. He was shameless, unafraid to show his brokenness, and unashamed of his wounded body.
In her book "Shame-Less," Nadia Bolz-Weber reflects on this powerful moment and draws parallels to our own lives. She writes, "Our pain and failure - the things we so often try to hide, the things that create shame, the things that scar - are what give us texture. And without texture, there is nothing for others to connect to." Vulnerability, defined as a state of emotional exposure that comes with uncertainty, involves being willing to accept the emotional risk that comes from being open and willing to love and be loved.
Vulnerability can take many forms, such as asking for help, sharing challenges, speaking shame out loud, expressing emotions, setting boundaries, talking about mistakes or areas of weakness, and taking chances that could result in rejection. It requires courage, clear communication, and self-awareness. It also requires setting boundaries to protect oneself while being open and authentic.
Embracing vulnerability creates connections with others, builds trust, and fosters intimacy. It allows for authentic relationships to flourish, creating safe spaces where people can show up and be seen, despite their fears and shame. It creates the container for transformation and allows one's values to come before others' expectations. Vulnerability allows for true connection, beyond superficial levels, where one can truly know and be known.
However, vulnerability is not about oversharing or dumping emotions onto others without considering their boundaries. It's not about hustling for worthiness or seeking attention. It's not about leaving others feeling unsafe, disconnected, or blindsided. It's about finding the balance between sharing and respecting boundaries, being authentic and allowing others authenticity to shine through. Vulnerability always supports connection and whole-hearted living.
Brené Brown, self-proclaimed shame researcher, says, "Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty." We don't get to pick and choose the experiences and emotions we want. If we numb ourselves to the pain and grief of life, we also automatically numb to the joy and wonder of life as well. Embracing vulnerability means being open to all experiences, not just the easy ones, and allowing ourselves to be seen in our entirety.
In a world that often encourages hiding our wounds and imperfections, Jesus' example of showing his scars and brokenness serves as a powerful reminder of the beauty and power of vulnerability. Embracing vulnerability allows us to connect with others on a deeper level, create safe spaces, and foster authenticity. It requires courage, self-awareness, and clear communication. Let us strive to be shameless, unafraid to show our wounds and scars, and embrace vulnerability as a pathway to true connection and transformation.
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